Last week I started the book Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst. My awesome friend, Kat Negrete, asked if I wanted to start with her. I’ve thought about reading this book for years but never have gotten around to it. I want to say it’s because I’ve been busy or I don’t have a lot of time for extra reading with Josiah, work and all the travel I do. But the truth is: I think deep down I knew it would challenge me and make me uncomfortable; and I wasn’t ready for that.
It’s easy to talk about change; to say I’m going to eat better and exercise. The talk is easy, but that’s all it’s been. No one challenges you when you’re eating pizza if you’re saying how you’re starting your diet next week, or you went to the gym every day, so this is your cheat. No one challenges you if you’re talking about how you’re going to try to lose weight, even if you’re not actually doing it. No one challenges you, so the excuses go on and on. Continue reading
I’ve had an epiphany. These last few months Selah’s been traveling non-stop. I’ve been home one weekend since mid-August. It’s been crazy. On one of my exhausting weekends where I took a Thursday night red-eye out of SFO, landing late morning in who-knows-where, I was attempting to sleep for a few hours in a hotel room and as I was laying there, restless, exhausted but unable to sleep I began to think about my weight. Again. It seems I’m always thinking about my weight. And as I lay there, I wondered how was I ever going to get this weight off. Again. When am I going to be normal; and then came the epiphany? What is normal? And why do I want to be it?
You see, I realized that my entire life I looked at thin people as “normal” and myself as not. And if I could just diet enough, I could diet myself into a place of being normal just like them. In my mind, being normal meant that I could eat what I want, exercise if I want, or not and be thin. So every diet, every exercise program, every calorie counted was working towards one goal: normal. As I lay in that hotel bed I also realized, there is no such thing as normal. As I mentally cataloged my thin friends and family members I began to realize that none of them eat what they want when they want and don’t exercise. None of them are just thin because they’re normal. They’re thin/fit because they work at it. My sister limits her carbs and walks or hikes 6 days a week. My brother runs. My thin friends at church eat clean and go to the gym. THAT is their normal. Normal is having a healthy eating and exercising regimen that keeps them at the body they desire. Continue reading